Sunday, June 24, 2007

So cute girl, where does your mind lie

Good evening, fellows and females. Let me make a little description. I know this girl (this is not the girl who I mentioned in a previous session I had a crush on, while I would not be opposed to dating this girl, I don't really have those kind of feelings for her, she is simply a friend of mine, who stands out in my memory because of a particular attribute that I would assign to her) who can be and almost certainly often is described as cute. I want my description to be vague enough that no one, most especially the girl in question will suspect who I am describing (if I was asked by that girl if it was her I would tell her the truth, this is a matter I would like to remain secret, but not so much that I would lie about it). Anyways, she is cute. I do not mean that in the general beautiful way, but rather in cute as in, I dunno, pretty, darling, or lovely but not necessarily sexy. I mean she is attractive, and she is not not-sexy or manish but she is not particularly prominent in the respects where you usually would assign sexiness (well, I'm not really sure on that point, I haven't made a detailed lookover of her).

She has a pretty face, a small frame, a good natured and friendly spirit, amusing, sometimes silly, and well, cute habits, and an innocent way about her. There are also other matters that render her to most cute, including some which are probably unfair, but which I will refrain from getting into due to my desire to preserve her anonymity. Now in general I have no problem with cuteness, I often enjoy it in media, objects, animals and people. I do get annoyed when cuteness disguises a lack of substance or is overdone to the point of annoyance, excess, or obsession. I also get annoyed when an obession on cuteness is a limiting factor on someone, becoming a facade they must maintain or reducing their intelligence to that of an infant. I feel that is a problem among women's culture in many parts of the world and sub-cultures. None of these problems with over-cuteness plague the girl I am talking about (at least given how much I know about her, which is a decent amount but not that much, but how much can one ever really know about another person? (Even taking that limit into consideration I'd still have to stick with I know a decent amount about her but not that much)).

She is overall a nice girl, a good catch. While I am not especially given to dating her now, it would not seem strange to find out that somewhere down the road of life we got together. Now I don't know really how this hypothetical relationship would work, but if it was one where piercingly personal questions were the norm or at least could be asked in a direct manner, I would ask her what being cute was really like. Did she enjoy being cute? Did her cuteness ever feel like a burden? Did her cuteness, even when positive, get in the way of the image she wanted to project? These are serious questions that I wonder about, because when a person has an attribute that is exceptionally prominent, often it is difficult or impossible for that person to turn that attribute off. And sometimes an attribute, even one such as cuteness, can be annoying to be associated with, can overshadow a message you want to get across, or can carry with it its own responsibilities. If I could I might ask her if it was like being funny?
That's an attribute that I've had to deal with. It's a positive attribute, undoubtably, but I never really intended to have it. I always rather wanted to be cool or reliable, but perhaps much more than those two qualities I am funny. This attribute sometimes makes it difficult for me to make a serious point and sometimes it carries with it a responsibility to entertain. But overall I like being funny, the burden it carries, while at times considerable is never overwhelming, and it is counteracted by the joy I get at making other people happy. I would like to be serious, cool, and known for greatness and glory, but I suppose I'll simply try to be all that in addition to being funny. I wouldn't want to leave behind an ability to chase away worries or draw out smiles simply for glory, it's too precious to me. I wonder if cuteness is like that. Or perhaps it's a different beast all together. While at times I can act cute, I don't really have a cute appearance, and overall I'm more eccentric than cute, and I certainly am not as cute as the girl I have been describing. If I really wanted to have an idea about what being cute was like I'd probably have to ask her, but that's a question that does not lend itself to most conversations, so I may have to wait a long time for the right opportunity to occur for me to ask the question. And perhaps that opportunity will never occur. Alas, but there will always be the mysteries of the places other people's minds do tred, and perhaps this cute girl's mind's place of rest will never be known to me.

That's all I have to say about that, for now at least. So anyways, take it to your head, take it to your heart, and remember Rand rocks. Goodnight Folks!

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