So right now I'm a swirl of different competing emotions, as usual really, although the mix is different as each moment the circumstances are unique.
I've been feeling listless, and after some advice, I realized that much of it is because I'm not really moving toward anything, and when it comes down to it, I'm like a shark, I'm either moving or I'm dead. Actually that's a tad dramatic, but thus I have to get to work.
See that's what I've been avoiding for a while now, that's why, although I've been postulating and brain-storming, I haven't been doing sessions here or posting much on the web, or even writing into some final form one of my ideas or projects. I've been keeping everything ethereal and semi-imaginary, thus I feel no pressure from them. Ah, but I must invite pressure, I must thrust it on me so I can be pushed forward and then...
Well, one thing I need to always watch out for is over ambition, but this sort of feeling I've had now is under-ambition, a fear of ambition, and that doesn't suit me either.
So it's time to suit up and get to work.
And what is work you ask?
Well, it's not exactly my profession, since I have none at the moment and what I am going to be able to get at this point in my life is unlikely my dream job, but getting a profession is on my goals list, so job-hunting, that's a one.
Sending out published work, that's a maybe, I'm not sure how much time I should devote to that, but I should at least start writing stories more.
Finishing and running programs I've been working on, that's a one.
Really mastering tech I've been dabbling with, that's a one.
Seeing stuff on my to-see list and reading stuff on my to-read list, well there you go.
Of course that's all short-term stuff to get done with, because essentially I'm still on semi-vacation, which isn't bad, but full vacation, full-doing-nothing vacation, I'm tired and done with that.
So on to the wild blue yonder, Rand-style all the way!
So take it to your head, take it to your heart and remember Rand rocks. Goodnight Folks! And God bless.
4 months ago