Be yourself is all that you can... but who is you?

So more or less I'm back together again.

And what have I learned?

Not much really. Little things here and there. Mainly that disease is something that should not be ignored, and people are things that should be engaged, and stuff is stuff that should verb. I think you get my drift.

Big question remains the future.

I think I have that one figured out. I no longer have a grand design for my life, but my hope is that I get a nice easy-going 9-5 job at decent pay which allows me to have a life on the side. Not too much to ask no?

What might be too much to ask is for that life on the side, which for me would include all sorts of random projects but especially my writing, to be my real life whereas my work is just something I do 8 hours a day. Is that a delusion?

I'm trying to be realistic but not to give up my dreams, but is that necessarily possible?

It's a balancing act sure... but is it possible?

I think so. For me, I'm not sure of any other way to really live. Well, no I know of other ways, but they don't especially appeal to me. I could for example concentrate on my friendships or focus primarily on getting a wife, but those sorts of things, it's hard to imagine for me that being my life's focus.

I guess I still feel I'm something of a man of destiny, but more than that I feel like I have to try to be a man of destiny. And I think that can be enough, even if it looks pathetic and delusional from all angles except mine.

I mean I still want family, friends, etc. and maybe I'm flexible for those dominating my life if things change, but for now, for right now I suppose I still have got too much rock in my soul.

But the fact still looms large in my mind, it IS a long way to the top if you want to rock and roll...

Is that distance more than my legs can take me?

Screw that, Let's Jam!

No one jams like the Bebop! - I'm working on some special theories for a new session on Cowboy Bebop.

After that, I thought you could use some more trumpets and anime, so here's Cake with Neon Genesis Evangelion.

But if after that you think it's easy to rock and rhyme, well, let Run DMC remind you that It's Tricky

And you should listen to Run, because he's a Reverend, but if you don't listen to a preacher man, perhaps you'll listen to his son, in Accapella! (kudos Acquire Accapella).

Very beautiful eh? Just like Axel Rose thought his subject was in Sweet Child of Mine.

Except that it's his girlfriend and eventual wife, which makes calling her Sweet Child of Mine a little odd, don't you think? Well Rock and Roll will do that to you, but still I got to say, as Twisted Sister would "I wanna rock!".

But like I said it's a long way to the top if you want to rock and roll, also School of Rock = Awesome Movie.

Anyways, that's about all I got for now...

So take it to your heart, take it to your head, and remember... Rand Rocks!

Goodnight Folks!