I like acting grand. After all I am the great and glorious Rand!!!
A part of this can be attributed to slight bursts of semi-mania, when I really do believe everything's in my grasp and if I just try...
Well, those feelings I can elaborate on later.
But even when I'm away from those delusions, I still like to act grand. Even when I know that I am standing far from grandness with the subject at hand. I like to talk and think as if I had abilities and courage far beyond my actualities. And it's more than pretend.
What it is, is a philosophy I've detailed better elsewhere, called "False Bravado." It is a philosophy targeted best for those dealing with moments of the profoundest self-doubt (like me on occasion), but I like to think it also has some everyday value.
Because I like to think human beings are creatures of immense potential. I think most people would agree with that statement, but people rarely think what that means. It means we too have immense potential. Then why is not realized?
Fear, Circumstance, Personal Flaws, Lack of Direction, Misguided Philosophies, the list can go on infinitely.
But I like to think we can transcend those limits, with God's help of course (that is important to remember, as remembering our insignificant (power-wise, although in His eyes we are His precious creation) stature before God is often the barrier between False Bravado and true delusions of grandeur).
How is the big question here. And my proposal, and the heart of False Bravado, is that we can achieve this transcendence by acting and thinking beyond our current means. By pushing ourselves beyond who we are to who we want to be. By acting grandly, even if we fall short...
But False Bravado is a process. Here is a key to remember. Acting grandly does not give you grandeur. It can start you on the path to self-improvement, but it is not magic. Sometimes our limitations are illusions and denouncing them alone is enough to overcome them, but more often, our flaws are real and cannot be dismissed within a thought.
Instead we must strive...
And at times we must fail. Practitioners of False Bravado must be prepared for failure, because when you push yourself beyond your means, sometimes you won't be able to make up the difference, and sometimes no one will be around to help you out, and sometimes...
You fall. But a true student of False Bravado must be willing to get back up again, and even if he or she is hurting, he or she must believe that the pain can be overcome. And with the help of God it can.
But every now and then, even a master of False Bravado like myself must face the gap between his or her intentions and reality and feel sorrow and a bit of desperation. And perhaps fail. But even then the way of False Bravado demands that the sorrow be conquered and the desperation tossed aside even if only in the imagination of grandeur. And then with learning every day, especially after each fall, with God's help, there will come one fine day when sorrow can be conquered and desperation can be tossed aside. And grandeur can then be grasped (not the grandeur of mastery mind you, grandeur's definition depends always with the definer, but the greatest grandeur a human can achieve in my book (I think you know which book I'm talking about) is the grandeur of the servant of God).
Or so such is the philosophy of False Bravado.
So take it to your head, take it to your heart and remember Rand rocks. Goodnight Folks!
And God Bless.
6 months ago